I first heard the news while I was working out at the gym. I was 25 minutes into my workout on the elliptical when the Today Show announced that Seal and Heidi Klum were separating and headed for divorce. As the anchors continued to discuss the separation, they read a statement from the star’s publicists stating how much love and respect they have for each other. Heidi and Seal hoped that the separation process was as smooth as possible. I was shocked to say the least.
Let me digress for a moment. We’re all aware that it’s extremely difficult to make a relationship last when you are a celebrity. However, it appeared that they were different from the others in Hollywood. They had found the secret to long lasting love. Every picture I saw of the two of them showed a couple very much in love. Every article I read about the two of them discussed their strong devotion to each other and their four children. In fact, it was common knowledge that every year Heidi and Seal renewed their vows to each other.
The thing is, I’ve always had this vision of Seal and Heidi having the PERFECT marriage. I bet you did as well. Why wouldn’t I be shocked to hear that they were ending their marriage? They always looked so happy together and openly talked about their happiness on every show they appeared on. They shared their secrets to having bliss in a relationship in every magazine article. They made numerous public displays of affection. So why did they have to let me down?
Relationships are difficult. I don’t know anyone that would dispute that fact. As time goes on in a relationship, both individuals need to work hard to nurture the relationship. If one of the individuals stops trying, the relationship will falter. I hate to say it, but there’s no such thing as perfect love. Every relationship is fragile and needs constant watering and care by both parties in order for it to thrive. Even in Hollywood.
Often, we get caught up in the illusion of love. Face it— our lives can be pretty mundane compared to celebrities. Seal and Heidi’s lives seemed downright glamorous. They appeared to have it all. Maybe we began to buy in to their illusion, the world they wanted to paint for us. When you look back, you begin to wonder whether Heidi and Seal were trying to convince themselves as much as us, that everything was wonderful.
The next time you begin to ponder why your relationship is not as great as your neighbors or your friends, think again. There is no perfect love or perfect guy. My mother use to say, “no one knows what goes on behind closed doors”. That perfect marriage you covet is probably not as perfect as you think. Take that energy that you’re wasting on the illusion and invest it into your own relationship. You’ll be glad you did.